Thursday, April 01, 2004
April's Fool
Joe & I bought a Kickboxing exercise video the other night. We watched/tried to participate in about 7 minutes of it & then put it on pause. That was Tuesday. It is still on pause.
BUT, I am going to get fit, gosh darnit! I'm way too poor to join a gym, but I am going to learn to kickbox & Denise Austin's going to be my guru.
Today, Jeffrey would have been 26. It is/(was?) his birthday. A friend of mine at work gave me yellow flowers. I'm so touched. I cannot explain how touched I am.
Last night, I went to Target on Queens Blvd to go "baby-crazy" for Dan & Dena's baby, tentatively named Benjamin Joseph, scheduled to be born on June 6th (yes, that's D-Day). I bought a 3-pack of little outfits* for 0-3 months, another little outfit for 9 months, a green cow rattle, and some socks. I didn't realize baby clothes were so cheap. I could have kept going.
The baby shower is this Sunday in New Jersey. I hate it when people kvetch about commuting to Queens to see me, but I also HATE going to New Jersey. Maybe this is a little bit hypocritical, but at least Queens is one of the 5 boroughs & at least I am near a subway. And, at least I know where the fuck I am when I'm in Queens. And, I am not that far out in Queens, so NAAAAAH.
Tonight, I am going to go home after work & probably speak to my entire family on the phone. It won't be easy. I think I am going to write my brother a letter & mail it, sort of symbolically sending it out into the world, knowing it won't reach him but it won't reach anyone else either.
I'm at work, so I can't write about this. Too easy to cry today.
-m
*Little Outfit = those one-piece things that snap
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Joe & I bought a Kickboxing exercise video the other night. We watched/tried to participate in about 7 minutes of it & then put it on pause. That was Tuesday. It is still on pause.
BUT, I am going to get fit, gosh darnit! I'm way too poor to join a gym, but I am going to learn to kickbox & Denise Austin's going to be my guru.
Today, Jeffrey would have been 26. It is/(was?) his birthday. A friend of mine at work gave me yellow flowers. I'm so touched. I cannot explain how touched I am.
Last night, I went to Target on Queens Blvd to go "baby-crazy" for Dan & Dena's baby, tentatively named Benjamin Joseph, scheduled to be born on June 6th (yes, that's D-Day). I bought a 3-pack of little outfits* for 0-3 months, another little outfit for 9 months, a green cow rattle, and some socks. I didn't realize baby clothes were so cheap. I could have kept going.
The baby shower is this Sunday in New Jersey. I hate it when people kvetch about commuting to Queens to see me, but I also HATE going to New Jersey. Maybe this is a little bit hypocritical, but at least Queens is one of the 5 boroughs & at least I am near a subway. And, at least I know where the fuck I am when I'm in Queens. And, I am not that far out in Queens, so NAAAAAH.
Tonight, I am going to go home after work & probably speak to my entire family on the phone. It won't be easy. I think I am going to write my brother a letter & mail it, sort of symbolically sending it out into the world, knowing it won't reach him but it won't reach anyone else either.
I'm at work, so I can't write about this. Too easy to cry today.
-m
*Little Outfit = those one-piece things that snap
